NollaCorp Inc. is an investment holding company that I founded about 5 years ago. We haven’t taken off just yet but to be honest, that’s largely in part due to my immense fear of “going broke” and “losing money”. Between You and I, the truth is that I’ve had plenty of opportunities in my lifetime to make great investments. Unfortunately out of fear, I chose not to. Instead, I chose to just keep my money, letting it sit until inflation practically ate it all away. I was so naive and untrusting of my own judgment at that time, that I couldn’t really blame anyone but myself. Each and every time a good investment opportunity would come my way, I would find some excuse to not take advantage of it. Then I would turn around and complain about how I had no opportunities coming my way. Well, that obviously wasn’t true now, was it?
Success and Money at a Young Age Is Not Always Good
I often like to joke that I wish I could have experienced my business success at my current age, 27, rather than having such success at age 23. While I am grateful to have achieved such a feat at such a young age, I can’t help but to think about how different things may have been, had I been a tad bit more mature at that time. Being immature and coming from nothing to sudden success, is such a recipe for disaster. And when I say immature, I mean emotionally immature. Being 22 and making $2,500+ weekly was just something that was unheard of for me. Nobody around me was making that kind of money, legally that is, so It’s not like I really had any guidance around me at that time. Back then, a lot of the decisions that I made were emotionally driven and that was a terrible mistake. If you allow your emotions to consume and control you, you will always remain in the same space because intense emotions often breed inaction. Allow me to expound….
“Intense Emotions Often Breeds Inaction”
Trepidation Is A Recipe For Disaster; It Can Leave You Stuck
Trepidation; Feelings of Fear or Agitation That Something May Happen
Being emotionally driven is one of the biggest catalysts that tends to hold us back from achieving our dreams. When you’re too stuck in your emotions, the results are often things such as procrastination, inaction, rumination, and pretty much anything other than actually taking any action. Fear is one of the strongest emotions that often grips us like a pair of pliers, and a lot of it stems from our childhood trauma. I don’t think we understand how much our emotions play a role in our decision-making. Honestly, the main reason a lot of us can’t succeed in life is simply because we feel so much. When it comes to feelings of fear, we are usually left paralyzed because there is something that we just don’t want to face and so we do nothing at all. That something could be the fear of going broke, fear of being judged by others, fear of success itself, fear of failure, fear that you’re not good enough, etc. Whatever it is, your first step is to get down to the WHY of your fear and work through it fervently. Most of the things that we fear may happen to us, almost never come to fruition.
Fear is Not Innate So Where Does It Originate For You?
The first step to overcoming fear is to figure out the reason why you’re so fearful in the first place. I’ve always had fear surrounding money, that’s why I always have it. I have been working since I was 13-14 years old, that’s when my story truly began. Growing up my mom complained a lot about bills and rightfully so. She was a single mother dealing with her own trauma and well, dealing with her emotions was never her strong suit. She would often have mental breakdowns and lack of finances was almost always the culprit. Though she was a hard worker, money was sometimes still hard to come by.
My dad was much different, but that’s because well, he’s selfish. What’s his is his, point blank period. See my mom was never selfish, she was a giver and she would often give MORE than what we had. Her main issue was that she could never say the words “NO”. Being unable to tell people no stems from something much deeper. Perhaps it was a traumatic response from her own childhood that left her unable to draw boundaries for herself. Behavior that I later picked up on as well but that’s for another writing. Because of this though, I grew up believing that money was scarce and the only way to ensure that you’d never be broke is to always keep it. And this belief served me well until it was finally time to invest large sums of money.
I Had Finally Figured Out Why I Was So Fearful of Spending Money
After making so much money, I could never understand why I wasn’t able to actually take action when it came to certain opportunities. Particularly, it was the opportunities that would require an investment of large sums of money. I had the chance to make 3 real estate investments that I chose not to make due to my fears of losing the money. I know for a fact that one of those opportunities turned out to be a massive success and it would have literally been my gateway ticket to becoming a house flipper. The amount that the investment would have cost me? Just $6,000, which at the time was a drop in the bucket for me.
However, instead of worrying about the positives that would come from the investment. I focused solely on the negatives because my beliefs about money were rooted in negative beliefs. Instead of being worried about how much I could grow, I worried more about what would happen to me financially if it everything went left; The astounding answer to that question? Nothing, because I still had plenty of money left. This was just my own way of talking myself out of the investment so that I could SAVE the money instead. It was at this moment that I realized that my emotions and fear had been ruining my opportunities.
How We Allow Our Emotions To Ruin Our Growth
Many of us are not taught how to handle our emotions. For this reason, in some situations, we are unequipped to make informed decisions. We can only make informed decisions if we can understand the feelings that surround the said choice. If we are always driven by our emotions, we’re almost always going to make the decision that makes us feel most comfortable. The problem with this though is that it encourages us to stay stagnant because we’re often going to choose the road that’s well traveled because it’s easier. When I decided not to make that investment, I allowed my feelings of fear to drive that decision. That in return ruined a great opportunity for me and this is a classic case of allowing fear to control you.
However though, on a positive note. This experience taught me so much about myself and looking back, I’m actually glad that it happened. Sometimes, the money is not important but the lesson is. It’s things like this that teach you who you really are and reflect the areas in which you need improvement.
I hope my story resonated with you! If you enjoy my writings, consider subscribing to my stories. =)